i can be the ship, or i can be the water. but i can never be both at the same time.

they played the song again & i remember what it had done to him inside of me before, i remember how i let him leave & it was easy, i was free & i was somewhere else, or at least on the way to someplace different. so i hoped maybe this time you would leave me, & i stood with my eyes closed & i felt you rise up out of me & as i stood you hovered overhead like a tornado or a hurricane & the wind was blowing even though we were all inside & it was probably just a few seconds but it felt like an hour as i waited for you to just fly away. & at last you stretched your arms out & i thought that you would be gone if i opened my eyes. so i did & i felt you re-enter my wasted frame, pushing against my ribs & putting your hands on my stomach.